But first - yesterdays feast! And all for me. I even used my grammas china just because I'm worth it.
And now... the rest of the story. I did go to the mall just cuz I wanted to, but I didn't go early since I didn't need the doorbusters, and waited till about 9. The people.. oh my gosh!! Just crazy. I saw a teenage boy walking around with a set of easter floppy bunny ears on. Ok then... but it was fun.
But as I got to shoppin, I was thinkin'. I know it looks like I've been spending tons of money on myself, and I have, but it's been a long journey. I've always been poor, growin' up there were four kids and no money since dad was always drunk We were dirt poor. Then from age 17-26 lived on my own and was so poor (and I hate to admit this) I couldn't always afford even a roll of toilet paper, and had to steal some off the roll in the grocery store bathroom. But at least I didn't steal the whole roll.. just sayin'. Then for the next 20 yrs it was the mister and the family and every cent went towards what was best for the family.
The boys have grown, married and moved away and the mister has been gone now for 3 years. It took me a good 2 years to not automatically go to the men's dept to buy something for him or one of the boys. Even up till last year, and even though separated, we shared christmas. I got him a
But this year is different. I ended up having a huge debt that I didn't spend and have tortured myself for this past year paying it off. He has a girlfriend now (even if she is 20 years older than him). Still. Hard as it is, I continue to try looking forward even if it ends up that i never meet someone else, I still have to keep learning how to move forward. Granted it's a two step forward, one back process, but it's still going forward and I'm finally getting to a good place in my heart.
All that to say... I don't ever want to look to my blog friends like I'm bragging about stuff. It's just that I'm the kind of person who needs to share my feelings... so when I'm broken hearted I put it on the blog, when my heart is happy or I'm excited, I put it on the blog. I just have to say stuff to SOMEONE...know what I mean? I'm gainfully employed, my bills are paid and I live alone. Why NOT spoil myself for a change?
So I''m absolutely LOVING my tv. Who knew? It is absolutely gorgeous and worth every single cent.. but then again, the computer did blow up (they finally did offer to send a repair guy, but I know a dead computer when I see one) and I figured it was a sign. So this morning my main stop was at the Apple.com store in the mall where I bought myself a brand spankin' new imac. Hello. I'm making my house so cozy and with such sweet gadgets I may never leave hehehe.
But for now... a turkey sandwich before I start setting it up *big grin* There is NO WAY that bad boy is gonna wait for Christmas :)