Wednesday's Child

Happy First Day of 2012

2012-01-01T11:04:00.004-05:00

Beautiful sky this morning and I had to run out and grab a picture. The sun hasn't shined here for a while, so I thought it was a good sign and ran to grab my REAL camera. Besides, even though I didn't make any resolutions, one thing I HAVE wanted to do was rekindle the passion I have for taking pictures. Sooo.... I put down the camera phone and picked my Nikon and this is the first picture of the day ;)

Hello 2012 - glad to see you!

What a great Christmas day!

2011-12-25T20:22:00.003-05:00

I have learned (during a whole LOT of hardship) over the years that you can MAKE the life you choose. Not Easy. Maybe the hardest thing you've ever had to do. But it CAN be done if you want it to.

But over the last 5-6 years, or whatever, I've learned a lot of tricks. I quite enjoyed myself today. The only thing I pray for the coming year is health.

I've finally learned to be content with MYSELF.. and live the life I've chosen. By default.. but even so.

Blessings above all blessings.. and I wish the same for you my friends.

Sweet dreams - we are blessed.

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-23T18:05:00.002-05:00

And Happy New Year!! In advance *grin*. I hope every and all that read this are Blessed in whatever way they need to be.

I'm already blessed more abundantly than I deserve and I know it.. but I still can't wait to open my prezzies! *grin*

Ok. I'm ready.

2011-12-13T15:08:00.002-05:00

I'm all set for the festivities! This is the first year ever I can just stay in through whatever snow might come. It's too cool for comprehension. I have goodies stocked and QVC was once again my friend. I can't wait till Christmas morning to see what I got me!! ::laughing::

Honestly though, the relief of retirement and steady income is amazingly helpful to the anxiety level. Truth be told. But I earned it. I made sure that NO MATTER WHAT I was gonna get 30 years so I could retire with health insurance. That's the big deal these days and I know how quick they add up... so I ended up with 30 1/2 years. Cool.

Anyway.. I'm trying to decide what to have for my Christmas dinner. Leaning toward ham and mashed potatoes. Another iron treatment tomorrow and dentist next week and I'll be free to just stay home and enjoy ;) Can't wait! I've been very, very good this year and I hope Santa noticed ;)

I am blessed and thankful beyond measure.

Lovin' it.

2011-12-06T17:01:00.002-05:00

I think I have the swing of retirement. Amen and Praise God. Hey, the truth, is the truth. I have the grace now of enough time to get the iron treatments I need and what a difference they make! As does a weekly B12 shot. I knew I hung on to my job to get to 30 years for a reason. Just sayin'. I am blessed.

I haven't had much to say because I've been in the clutches of dental work. Fun times. But my last toothache was no joke so I'm keepin' on top of things.

Current craving: Hot cocoa with peppermint.

Love it.

Profound Birthday to Me

2011-11-30T15:28:00.003-05:00

Please share it with me. I am 51 and freakin' fabulous! Take 10 minutes of your life and watch this video.

Click here.

We are blessed.

Update - I had to share this happy thing - Here I am, just have recently gotten so involved in hooping (taking classes now) - and on my Birthday - I pick up a Happy Meal and this is the toy in side. Hoop spins when you wind it up. Had to share ;D

Happy Birthday to Me! (Wed)

2011-11-28T20:01:00.002-05:00

Courtesy of http://www.astrologyzone.com

Now this solar eclipse will come by to provide excitement and new elements of positive change. You may also change your appearance now in a stunning way, as gradual changes within your personality and outlook may finally bubble up to the surface. It is logical that when we see ourselves differently, it would later translate into a new way of arranging our appearance or style of dress. Spirit drives manner, attitude, and eventually, looks. You are now standing on the cusp of a whole new cycle, and you can choose the direction you would like it to take. The closer your birthday falls to November 25, the more eclipse this month will affect you.

Burp.

2011-11-26T16:00:00.007-05:00

Honestly. Did ya all eat enough? I did... then today I put the leftovers in the freezer for another dinner, but it was a pretty darn good day after the parade finally got started. *grin*. I think for Christmas I'm just doing snacks though ;) And I'm still workin' away at the hoops. They are my muse. I can't do anything fancy yet - but I did just get a 4 DVD set to show me the moves, so I'll have something to do during the LONG winter we're about to start. ::sigh::

That's it for now. Just learning to be a retired person, and learning how to live in the moment. Lookin' back over the posts of the past few months, I find it hard to fathom how quickly and profoundly a world can change. In the blink of an eye. And I think I'm on the right side of MY path now.

And I am blessed.

Hooping talk..

2011-11-18T18:52:00.004-05:00

I'm addicted. To hoola hooping. Also called cardio hoop or hoop dancing. I just picked up enough tubing today at the local home store to make a hoop for every day of the week. It's totally amazing how much playin' with these hoops helps my anxiety! No directions or stress... just plain exhausting fun. It can be just a couple of spins or a half hour of practice for one trick. No rules. But I just can NOT hoop and be mad or worried... those things float away. I put on some good music and end up grinning and proud of myself for each little accomplishment. Especially the one where my jeans fit ;D

So there ya go. Of course I have pretty colored tape coming in the mail so I can make my own hoops. Picking the colors is part of the fun ;D and I'll post pictures soon.

I am feelin' so good I just don't have the words to explain. With my vitamins all up and the workouts - and so many of the stressful issues of the past are over and done - it's sort of like a dream. A very cool dream.

PS and by the way, ya just never know when a little encouragement from an internet friend can change your life in such a positive way... but it can and I'm thankful.

Beyond THANKFUL and extremely and truly blessed.

Wonder what I'm doing lately??

2011-11-14T11:17:00.001-05:00

Check out the link (thanks to Kath) and I DARE you not to smile.

Check it out by clicking here.

I have abs I never knew about, but hooping makes me happy. And so I shall.

And I am blessed ;D.

I was gonna quit.

2011-11-08T18:52:00.005-05:00

But I guess I'm not a quitter. I know it's been a while, but I've been busy gettin' healthy. I won my Disability retirement And Disability SSDI - both without a lawyer and all by my self. I will be proud of that 'till the day I die.

The only thing I can tell you today is that the doc is workin' on building up my vitamins, and I'm learning hoola hoop. I swear. Thanks to my friend Kath ( Kath, leave a comment and your url, I'm not able at the moment ;D). Anyway... a lot of vitamins later, the new doc has me on a good path and I'm havin' fun at my baby steps of cardio hoop. (oh heck, now I gotta find a good link, but I just so happen to know one and here it is : )

So. I won my disability retirement, then, since it was instigated by my work but not for THAT reason, I also won SSDI. My only one goal now is to be healthy. Finances are no longer a worry and Pilates and Hooping seem to be doin' the trick and I'm smiling.

I am SO, SO blessed. God is good. Every day.

Check this out - hooping (NOT ME) http://youtu.be/bI1MNY77fdk Get Excited ;D

We gotta take what we can and enjoy. May God bless us, every one. Amen.

Good morning, Good morning.

2011-09-29T08:42:00.003-04:00

This was my iphone pic of the day yesterday from my front door. This morning is a whole nother story - dark, cold and rainy. So I thought I'd just remember yesterday while I drink my coffee. I'm feelin' Grrrreat today. Huh. Who'd have thunk? ::laughing:: Well, I did get started back on my vitamins and got my blood work done to work on the anemia - so it won't be long until I'm back to the Pilates. God is good.

Most of my big "life hurdles" are behind me... only a little ways to go now - but I need to get a good head start on just learning to enjoy each and every during the times both good and bad - ya just never know. Too many people close to me have been passing lately. Gotta start remembering to look up and be thankful.

Anyway, that's all. Just thought I'd take a moment and share. And be grateful. And I am.

All is well

2011-09-26T14:24:00.003-04:00

I haven't been blogging much - VERY mucho paperwork/notary/copies/certified mail needs to happen when you're retired at 50. (Deleted portion deserves its own post.)

But!!

I do believe it's all done for the retirement situation and the numbers are correct. I just stayed low, hunkered down, paid my bills and put my food on a credit card until the storm was over. But now it is... and they owe me a CHUNK of money ;)

And soon enough friends - my actual retirement adventures may begin! Was invited to an AWESOME pig roast this past weekend and I went. SO glad I did. I needed to get out and it was a really cool party - tons of people - a couple kegs, huge fire and a roasted pig - what else do I need to say? People set up tents in the backyard so there was no driving and most were college kids with stamina. Remember those days?

Anyway, I finally figured out a girl cannot live by bologna sandwiches alone - and tonight shall be a celebratory feast! Ham steak, sweet potatoes, actual vegetables!!! I mean - thats sayin' a lot!

So now that the financial numbers are looking WAAAAYYYYY much better - I expect to have a lot more to talk about soon ;)

And I am profoundly and abundantly blessed - even if I don't realize it until the very last second sometimes - Sometimes the good Lord saves me from myself.

Mmmmm.

2011-09-21T17:43:00.004-04:00

Pepperoni rolls in the oven. This is try #2, #1 was epic failure. So this time I bought some pizza dough, wrapped up some stuff, added egg washed and now baking till they look done.

So the other interesting thing today... when I pulled into the bank drive thru - I saw a guy laying in the front yard of the bank. Under the shade tree. Weedeater laying next to him and his fingers laced behind his head.

Me at drivethru: You know you have a guy laying in your front yard, right?

Her: No.

Me: Well he is. Full on stretched out.

(I can see her thru window, she said something to people inside because another guy started mimicked how the guy was laying out there since apparently he saw him too, but didn't say anything).

Her: We'll check into it.

Well, it took them a hell of a long time. I mean, what if the guy was HURT instead of drunk. Huh? What then?? He could have rolled onto the pavement! I stayed for several minutes. The weedeater was turned off thank goodness, because he rolled over on it. I never saw the people come out of the bank but I finally saw the "yard man" hunch himself up on one elbow and I figure he'd be all right.

His job? Maybe not so much, but what was I to do? I had to tell. Poor guy.

Prison Shows

2011-09-16T14:09:00.002-04:00

I get addicted to watching them. Any and all. Most likely because a mens max prison was my first "real" job. I pretty much grew up there, working from age 19-30 before moving on. Anyway... I'm always fascinated. So I was watching one a little while ago and it was talking about a mans last meal before execution. And it made me think.... Sad as it is, I think mine would be:

a piece of KFC chicken and coleslaw

a piece of good cornbread baked in a skillet with lots of melting butter on top

and strawberry shortcake made with angel cake, not biscuits

And now. I am STARVING. Feel free to add to my list ;D

I know.

2011-09-15T15:00:00.002-04:00

I'm never gonna have clear focused pictures. I only have use of one eye (sorry LONG TIME blog friends, I never told ya about that before. sorry. I should have but now I did.) And the vision in that eye is 20/550. I wear glasses, but I fear I'm never gonna have a sharp enough eye for stock photography. But it is what it is and I enjoy it. That's why the colors are what draw me.

And again, and again, I am abundantly blessed. Amen.

I didn't even know!

2011-09-15T14:34:00.003-04:00

I had no idea that little bumble bee was there when I took the picture, but I'm glad it was ;D

I am blessed.

Tuckered out

2011-09-10T17:35:00.003-04:00

I am. I've worked around the house all day and I don't care that it's not yet dark, but a shower and bed aren't too far away. I've pretty much been puttering around and gettin' my routine down. Hard to believe it's only been two months since I retired... but oh how great it is. Even when I'm bored - I'm still very grateful. I guess I thought that with the end of work would also come the end of the disabling anxiety. I was wrong. It's there just different but I'm working on it and that's the best I can do.

Tomorrow my project is a big one. I'm finally gonna figure out that giant rug shampoo thingy that I bought some time last year. The carpets have been patient but I think they've reached their limit. I just HATE having to sit down with something and pay attention and figure out directions. It's worse than eating liver or spinach. The trouble is that I also have NO CLUE about the workings of ANYTHING so I tend to put it off because I KNOW I have to read the stupid directions. And this is why I've had a carpet cleaner for a year that I haven't used yet.

So there.

Next week I have a hearing that's a big one and determines a large part of my future. Think good thoughts for me please.

And now I shall toddle off like an old lady to prepare for night before the sun goes down... and besides.. THIS old lady still has a hangover from yesterday. I don't get out much but when I do... I apparently can overdo!!

Morning coffee.

2011-08-30T08:58:00.002-04:00

Yup, I got plenty - come on over. Until then you'll just have to put up with these random thoughts as I sip my third cup.

Splenda might be better for ya, but Sweet n Low is MUCH better tasting, in my opinion.

My lawn looks beautiful and it's gonna be such a beautiful day out there it's likely to hurt my eyes.

As I opened my new refill of pain med bottle this morning, realized doc upped the strength and never hold me. Huh. Thank God for different colors.

I'm thinkin' about takin' myself out to eat today. I even know where, just not when. We shall see.

The cats are now finally back to normal after my week absence. Big kitty has stopped her hissing and has finally come into the living room. At this moment they are back to their usual racing over and around this house and God help them that gets in the way. Hmmm... maybe I need to go away again.

Did I tell ya about the dream I had the other night? If I told ya, already - never mind, I left my groom at the alter. He was everything a woman could want. Thoughtful, honest, etc. Perfect. Except when we got to the alter a) I realized I didn't want to be married again. b) I suddenly realized he was a foot shorter than me and c) I couldn't remember his damn name! Two days later and I'm still laughing about it because I remember that dream clear as a bell and I almost never remember my dreams.

So there ya go. Three cups of coffee down and I'm ready to get busy.

And I am blessed.

Hello Friends!

2011-08-28T10:20:00.002-04:00

I know.. I've been lazy. And busy. I hope ya'll are surviving the earthquakes and hurricanes. I was on a mountain top for the earthquake - I could HEAR that thing. It was awesome in power even though technically it wasn't very big. I just figured it was my dad rolling over in his grave. Just sayin'.

So I got back from the WV holler just head of the storm, perfect weather for the whole drive. And with the help of Sirius XM radio, I have recently started to enjoy long straight drives. Something good to listen to is as important as good weather to me. Things are good.

I love goin' to that mountain. It always restores my soul and I feel my dad everywhere. Anyway... I took some purty pictures down there and maybe I'll post some later. Gonna rearrange my computer desk for today's project. Wish me luck!

I am blessed.

Just 'cuz.

2011-08-15T17:29:00.000-04:00

Mercury in retrograde

2011-08-08T18:48:00.003-04:00

Apparently for most of the month, which means a sluggish and unproductive time. Spot on. I'm a month into my retirement now and settling in. Not much to blog about just now. I've gotten used to taking long naps and not feeling guilty. Not wearing a watch or setting the alarm, although I often still wake up with that anxiety... There was no way in the world I could ever have worked 5 more years until my normal retirement under the conditions I was put in. I know in my heart of hearts the stress would have killed me long before then... but no matter now because at the very last second, He scooped me up and I am free.

But this retrograde thing. I don't seem to have much ambition for anything and no real goal at the moment which seems to be a pretty common theme out the in the internet universe. I'm pretty sure that's a clear signal to sit back and relax. And I think I shall. But when it's over... look out! ::laughing::

And I am blessed.

PS - I'll make SURe to take a pic of my next sidewalk/road chalk masterpiece. It was kind of fun!

I'm thinking.

2011-08-06T12:27:00.001-04:00

It looks like a storm is coming. I think I'm gonna take my sidewalk chalk out there in the road and create a short lived masterpiece. When I'm done, I'm pretty sure it will a good thing the rain is coming to wash it away. Just sayin'.

It's so very quiet...

2011-08-02T06:58:00.000-04:00

The lawn looks lovely and the house isn't so bad either. It's a beautiful day out there. Somethin' about gettin' up early in the morning that I just love. Sometimes I go back to bed and sometimes I don't *grin*.

Now that the major shock of being retired is getting settled in my head and body, a lot seems different. I have more aches and pains - at least that I feel now that I'm not completely sedated 10 hours out of every day - but I'm workin' it out and it's getting better. I can't say my anxiety is completely gone, nor have I gotten rid of the Xanax completely, but it's a whole lot better and that's more than a girl can ask for.

I'd say I'm doin' pretty A-OK, all things considered. I think I might get out my kite flyin' stuff this afternoon.

And I am blessed.

I've been thinkin'

2011-07-31T12:23:00.002-04:00

It's time for a new blog banner. And I know that somewhere, some awesome person told me how to make one. And I saved the directions but now I can't find them, but it seemed very easy at the time.

I'm havin' trouble coming up with the right thing... I mean, I only got this idea about a few minutes ago. I always have been impulsive. ::laughing::

I'll figure it out, but any ideas that would "suit" me would be good.

Another recent discovery is that when a girl is home all day, she tends to drink more coffee than she might have when she worked. Just because it doesn't cost $3.95 a cup is reason enough. Anyway, I digress.

I'm about to get out that new hand held steamer I bought for myself a few Christmas's ago. It's brand new but now I have the time to use it! See? There was a method to that buying splurge last year! Look out little kitties.... I might be a danger ;D

And I am blessed.

Ok,

2011-07-27T16:37:00.003-04:00

It's all cool. The air is fixed. Amen. What a great day today! I saved up all my "to-do"s and did them today while I was a bright and sunny 78 degrees. The breeze was nice too! I've got a doc appt. comin' up in a week or two. I think my blood pressure meds need to be lowered now, Praise God. I just never knew it could be like this... and I know people don't really like me to talk about it unless they are retired too, and I try to keep the happy to a dull roar, but have Mercy it is a life change!!! I would have it that everyone could retire at an age young enough to enjoy it because whether it's the way it was or something new - there surely is a lot to enjoy.

I am blessed!

He came twice.

2011-07-25T16:52:00.002-04:00

The AIR CONDITIONING GUY! Geeze... get your minds out of the gutter. Anyway, he spent many an hour and replaced most of my ventwork and ducts... but the air is finally working. I may need major sedation when I see the bill... but it's all coooollll... *grin*.

So now, let the festivities begin. The cats even moved today! They haven't done much during the heatwave but there was nothing i could do. I was glad to see them feeling better today, and I do too.

I am blessed. And verrryyyy coool ;D

Waiting impatiently for the air conditioning guy...

2011-07-21T08:35:00.001-04:00

I mean, come on... the hottest day of the year and my air doesn't work. A girl has to get creative for entertainment.

Lovin' it.

2011-07-18T11:53:00.002-04:00

Gettin' up early and bein able to go back to bed if I want is lovely. It's still hard to believe and I keep on thinkin' I'm just on vacation *grin*. This morning I got to sit and watch a big 'ole thunderstorm while I sipped on a good coffee and yesterday I met friends at the lake.

Life is good and I am blessed.

Thunder on the mountain

2011-07-14T10:27:00.006-04:00

Click on the pics to see them bigger. I don't know how to blog, apparently... but it was a fine and honorable day.

Indeed.

Yep. I just got back from the "holler". I wore pink and pearls and dirty bare feet and had a blast. Pun intended. Back to the West Virginia holler where my dad lived and died. He would have burst with pride. The first half of that day I spent playin' poker with all the men who used to play with my dad. I was honored they all came, and they were proud to honor dad by doin' it. Besides, they kinda like me too. ::laughing:: And that night we gathered up a younger crowd and a couple daring men. I brought the fireworks and they did the job.

Words cannot describe the awesome of that night. It was perfectly still with not a leaf moving. The air was cool and the people were happy. The ring of trees around the holler and that circle of pure dark, sparkly night sky made the perfect frame for those fireworks. I'd dare to say they they could be seen across the county, and I'll never forget that day as long as I live.

All I know is it was my first trip back to the mountain since my dad passed, and I was plannin' to say hello and let him know I was doin' ok.

I think he saw me.

And I am blessed.

7/7/11

2011-07-07T08:11:00.003-04:00

Is now officially my first day of retirement. I chose the number specifically just because I like it. 7/7/11 feels kind of lucky to me ::laughing::

Life is already strangely different but in the most wonderful way. I haven't had to take any Xanax in days which is a miracle enough for me... but not having a clock rule my day is just as awesome. Now I have time to do all the little things. I picked about 4 cups of raspberries from my backyard yesterday. It's too hot to make jam so I put them in the freezer for another day but it was neat to get so many from a berry bush I never knew was there. Of course I could gather more, but it's a scratchy business and I thought 4 cups for one batch of jam was enough. *grin*

And I think today I'm gonna take my new wheels out for a spin and try it out by going to get my first soft serve ice cream cone of the summer - so how's that for livin' large?

Simple pleasures. I am abundantly and overwhelmingly blessed.

Oh my, my, my...

2011-07-02T17:27:00.007-04:00

The boss came to me at 2:00 on Friday and told me if I wanted it could be my last day. "huh?" She said they'd buy me out and go ahead and pay me for the holiday and the days I have left if I'd leave on Friday! Took me about 5 minutes to think about, then I said "Hell YES"!

I'm pretty sure they didn't like me telling everyone I won - especially since I told the Medical Director that I used to work for about two hours before the offer came *grin* and I think word got back. So I am an officially retired woman! No more work EVER!!!! Went today and bought myself a retirement present - Yaaaa HOOOO and it looks SO darn cute with my camper ;)

This is a pretty big adjustment, like a friend said, it's a major life change the same way getting married or buying a new house is.. but I think I'm gonna like it. Everyone keeps asking what I'm gonna do and I just say "Whatever I want".

And the reactions are priceless. When I went to the car dealer today and told him I was retiring - he pulled up his paperwork to do a double take on my birth date - I just laughed and said, yeah, I know I look too young - but my big smile said it all. And now I have a purty red SUV to tow my camper with. Another plus is this dealership gives all buyers a once year detailing and inspection for free for your birthday, plus free carwashes anytime you go to one of their dealerships! Cool, eh?

But for now, to bed for a nap. Head cold is still kickin' my butt. Funny thing is the car salesman had the same bad cold! I shared my box of Sucrets with him ::laughing:: and he couldn't stop thanking me. I'm picking the new baby up Tuesday and I can't wait! But for now.. back to bed.

I am blessed ;)

I'm amazed at the relief.

2011-06-28T06:45:00.003-04:00

It is just so darn profound. Surreal. After years of "serving" in hell in that state job with all the micro managers, politics, game playing and BS... I guess when under extreme stress you just get used to it, even if that means needing to be drugged out on a constant basis to survive.

But merciful God... now that the end of that chapter of life is closing, I know that life can feel and be different. Every day in every way since I got the news of retirement the waves of stress continue to fall away... and it's been many, many years since I've smiled so much and it feels good.

The only way I can compare it is to a Veteran who has been in heavy fighting for years, to quite suddenly and unexpectedly, be on a flight home. Difficult to understand and deal with at first, but as the reality of freedom slowly sinks in, life presents itself full of possibilities, and the feeling of being free and never having to go back is absolutely indescribable.

This past week I just filled the last Xanax prescription I'm ever gonna need. Just a few more days to go. God is good.

And I am blessed.

Ok, so it's starting to sink in.

2011-06-26T16:34:00.004-04:00

I feel so free already... about a week of work to go and I'm done. Most people at least have a few months or a year count down before retirement, and I've only had a few days to adjust to the idea... but I like it *grin* Today I spent the morning car shopping for an SUV to tow the camper with and then I came home and started sorting out huge piles of "work" clothes to take to the Goodwill. It's AMAZING to think of how freeing retirement will be when I do stuff like that. Heck, I might never wear a watch again ::laughing::

I also went to a benefit for a good friend last night. She's been having a hell of a fight with breast cancer but is now in remission!! And the benefit was good! I drank a lot, danced a lot, laughed a lot. It was great to get out and just have fun for a night. I needed that.

I have to say, I think I'm truly pretty happy... and it's been a good many years since I've said so. Excited too. Especially because for the last couple of years since I've been riding the bus to work - it equals about 10 hours total I'm out of the house 5 days a week and under so much stress that I about collapsed on the weekend.. but not anymore!!! I can't wait to clean this house inside out and upside down, sleep till noon and stay up past dark.

And sooon, my friends, my camping adventures will begin! But first, one more work week and some more tedious paperwork stuff for the Social Security Disability application and I'll be good to go. (I got a letter from social security yesterday - with all the worry about fraud and such- I was QUITE surprised that it not only contained MY paperwork, but also someone else's compete with their whole name, address, telephone number and Social Security number.) Good thing I'm honest. So there we are. Let the festivities begin *grin*

And I am BLESSED.

What a difference a day makes!

2011-06-23T20:39:00.004-04:00

Seems the Human Resource guy got the papers he needed today (he thought it was gonna take weeks) and when he called me at 4:22 this afternoon, he said that if I want to, I can be retired TOMORROW!!

I can't yet adjust to the fact that I'm gonna be retired - although I've told EVERYONE at work - which is why I think they're in a hurry to get me gone asap, but can't make me naner-naner. Tomorrow is too soon, and I have up to thirty more days to choose from. I'm meeting with him at 8am tomorrow (yeah, that's how fast they're rushing me). They've even already run the numbers for me on the financial side and I'm gonna be fine. But I've been thinking about it and I believe this time I'll go at the time of MY choice, not theirs. Besides, I need time just to soak up the goodness of knowing I WON!

Anyway... I picked up my new glasses (already!) and it is sooo good to see again ;D. Wow. Did I mention my head is spinning. This week just presented within its little self, a thousand new possibilities for me and I can't stop grinning.

Have I mentioned once or twice that I am BLESSED?

P.S. Can a girl EVER get tired of being told she looks way too young to retire? I think not and I heard it a lot today ::laughing::

Oh wait.. it gets even better~~!!!

2011-06-22T15:35:00.003-04:00

So I went and got me some reader glasses and they work ok, but I picked up that letter too and it said...

I CAN RETIRE!!! I'M APPROVED FOR DISABILITY RETIREMENT!!!!

And I wrote every letter, attended three hearings, numerous legal papers and wrote my own Memorandum of law pro se and I still won over the States attorney!!! Yes I WILL pat myself on the back, thank you very much, but it was a three year long battle, and more than 7 years of suffering with the PTSD.... I knew I had the truth on my side and I put my heart and soul into that three page pro se final response. I suspect disability retirement isn't often approved for those who acquire same without going to war. Just sayin'. From looking over the paperwork, it seems they made an exception for me and possibly a precedent for someone else in the same situation.

All I can say is Praise God and my kitties too for keeping me home today to get this letter ;DDDDDDD As you can see, I CAN'T get this smile off my face!!

Oh this is a good one...

2011-06-22T13:30:00.002-04:00

My cat stole my glasses!!!! My hand to God! I fell asleep on the couch last night, woke up and reached for my glasses and they were no where to be found. For two hours I searched and searched and searched. Threw couch cushions on the floor, felt around under tables and things (cuz I'm blind as a bat), still no glasses.

Ok, so what else could I do but call in sick to work, and yes, I DID say "my cat stole my glasses". Have mercy. So I had an OLD pair of computer glasses that worked good enough for me to see the road and I was at the opticians before they opened...good thing it wasn't far away and it turned out I was eligible for a new pair of regular and a pair of computer glasses (union benefit every two years). Bad thing is they won't be ready for a week.

Soooo... they took the frame from the old computer glasses I had on, put some "make do" lenses in and brought the cost down as much as they could for this extra pair. One teeeeensy little problem though. I wear bifocals and can't see a damn thing up close with these plain "make do" lenses on. As I type my nose is literally 6 inches from the computer. I wonder how that's gonna go for the rest of the week at work when I spend 8 solid hours punching numbers into a computer :::sigh:: I already know the migraines will be forthcoming.

And then I thought for SURE I'd get home and see my old glasses right away. Not so. I've looked for an hour now that I can see and I STILL can't find them. I highly suspect the little kitty since her toys are all over and under everything. She carries her favorites in her mouth... but come on, this place isn't that big! Where the HECK could they be???? But I can't worry about that now because there was also a note in the mail that I have a registered letter to be picked up at 3:00.... and highly unlikely it's gonna bring good news, whatever it might be.

First it was the dentist yesterday telling me the tooth he's working on that ALREADY has a root canal, now is gonna cost close to $1,000 to finish - yeah, NOW he tells me when it's only HALF done.. and now the glasses which even with my union plan, still had to drop another $300 today.

But ending on a good note, I did manage to stop at Taco Bell on the way home to score some lunch ;D . So that's my week so far, how YOU doin'? *grin*

The regal deer.

2011-06-21T06:33:00.004-04:00

They were there again this morning. Standing in the sunlit field across the road exactly opposite my house. Yesterday I looked out and saw them, then next thing I know, there was the doe with her buck right behind her. I swear as God is my witness, they stood in the road exactly in front of me and they were looking at me. For several minutes she looked and I admired the both of them.

I think I could be a scientific experiment of my own with how much stress a person really CAN handle before their body implodes. But I know these signs are meant to make me strong... and Lord knows I'm tryin'. Whatever kind of stress I thought I had before isn't anything compared to what I have now.... but I just try to insulate myself with Xanax and wrap that 2 mg layer with the insulation of the Lord and his angels wings and hope for the best.

I DO enjoy my front windows though. Every morning I sit there and watch the sun come up and wait for my friends the deer.

And I am blessed.

6PM update...she was there again when I got home from work...waiting for me. I crossed the road and admired her for a while..then went in and I haven't seen her for the rest of the night. I can't wait till morning ;D

PS,I have FOUR cameras and every battery is dead. Note to self: CHARGE THE BATTERIES!!!

Just one thing.

2011-06-17T15:11:00.002-04:00

Sometimes that's all it takes. I've waited a while but my new living room window is IN! Nothing fancy, but it CAN open from the top or bottom and tilt out for cleaning. It was worth the three month wait (Chris).

And I am THRILLED!

After about 25 years of living here... my house finally feels like a home and let the sun shine in.

I am so blessed and can't wait to see my first sunset with the new view ;)

A story about my dad Happy Father's Day

2011-06-16T17:07:00.001-04:00

My dad "died 10/20/2010. I thought this post was good for father's day from my other blog. "'Dad, I love you and I know you're watching over me." I know you're not resting in peace yet... but I swear on my life you will.

I've been thinkin' about my dad all day and I know many of you have been followin' the stories through the years and know that he's my absolute heart. But back in the day that wasn't how it was... he was a mean man who drank whiskey by the quart and his best friend was a loaded gun. I gotta say the truth, at one point when I moved out, at about 17, I didn't speak to him for 15 years. Truth. Then one day, for many reasons, I got in contact again and I bless the day. Anyway.. my brother told me this story a little while back and I'm sharin' it with you because it is so exactly my dad. So typical of him when he was drunk that we laughed at it then and at the same time we were always scared... sometimes too scared to breathe. Just sayin', but I laugh at it now. I know it's not funny at all... and I know some would be stunned.... but this is how we lived.

Anyway,

So when my dad first moved to a mountain in West Virginia about 30 years ago or so (there really wasn't much more than a path in the middle of some wild woods), and his then new girlfriend's (now long passed) kids called my dad on the phone one day to give him hell for taking their mother to such a God forsaken place and they were sayin' how they were gonna come after my dad and kick his ass.

They were on the phone so my dad said to them "hold on just a minute" - reached over, got his always loaded shotgun that was never more than a reach away, shot both hinges off the door - got back on the phone and said "son, you ain't gonna have any problems gettin' in."

Hehehehehe. I know you might not understand why I laugh at that but it's just so typical of him.. there's hundreds of stories like that - it's just how he rolled. He's a mountain man, and he drinks and sometimes those mountain people just live a different way. But I've since learned that He's a special one that dad of mine... and I pray for many more years of makin' up for the ones I lost. Amen.

Astrology

2011-06-13T17:34:00.002-04:00

I've always been fascinated. I am a Christian, but I believe God made everything for a reason, including the stars. Just had my chart done to find out I am Sagittarius with Aquarius rising. It pretty much blew my mind to read the descriptions of myself. Your astrological chart is started from the moment you took your first breath and the way all the stars and planets are aligned at that very second.

It was interesting to note in mine, that I would have a propensity towards anxiety conditions, and struggles with alcohol and gambling. *cough* Harsh, but true, and maybe easier to understand. It also said I would have an interest in things like astrology ::laughing::

I've been watching a lot of stuff on my ipad too. (I have loved that thing since the day I bought it) and a must see is Ancient Aliens The Series. I'm watching it on Netflix, but it might be on Hulu too. I'm gonna go back and watch it again - it's not about zombie type aliens, more like the history of the ancients of Sumeria, Egypt, Nazca lines, etc. Fascinating if you like that sort of thing, and I always have.

Anyway. Just thought I'd check in for a minute, but I'm hungry. Dinner is going to be a giant cheeseburger smothered in caramelized onions, and I can't wait *grin*.

I have to also apologize for not getting out to read many blogs lately. Since they shut down everything online at work we could possibly listen to and are monitoring our computers now... I don't dare and what with Twitter and Pilates and tryin' to tame my two wild beasts (also known as cats)... well, not much time left... but I'm gonna check back to Bloglines and see if it's working again. That was my blog reading demise since I can't figure out any good way on a mac to save the sites I want to read regularly. Suggestions helpful.

Other than that... enjoy your day. If everything is going to hell - just look around and find ONE little thing that makes you happy for today, this minute, and go for it. Simple things are good like maybe a dessert, a nice hand lotion or a walk on a cool night. As you can tell, I'm continuing my practice of trying to live and enjoy the moment - I've missed waaayyy too many already and don't intend to miss many more.

And I am blessed.

weird

2011-06-10T20:24:00.004-04:00

I just found out today that one of the nurses that took care of me during my "bad" surgery works in my department now - and she remembers more than I do. She told me quite a lot today that I had no memory of..... surreal much?

PS...is anyone else out there following the Casey Anthony trial? I'm obsessed.

I have so much fun sometimes.

2011-06-07T20:22:00.004-04:00

But I LOVE my "jewels". More often than not, that's what gets me to work in the morning. My clothes are probably "shabby" because I hate shopping... but the jewels. Nothing expensive and mostly from the Q, pearls, silver, agates and onyx... but it's SO much fun. And every single bit of is is "natural" meaning at some point created by God.

I am sure beyond doubt the natural stones bring good energy.... and even a DOCTOR complimented me on my necklace yesterday.

Whatever gets ya through the day in a positive and healthy way.. why not? I think tomorrow will be either (well, really not so much since it's supposed to be 95, but I'm in air conditioning all day) pure silver or blue agate middle finger ring (always the middle finger so i can flip the bird in a pretty and lady like fashion), and a blue moonstone ankle bracelet.

The truth of it is.... a few years ago I went to a church. A grey haired, tiny little black lady came up to me and said "when I first saw you, I thought of you as a shining jewel to God". She wrote down her "vision" and I carry it in my wallet even today.

Since then, I've decided to let my light shine and make sure God can see me at all times ;)

I am SO blessed and I thank God every day. Amen.

My next 30 years..

2011-06-05T14:25:00.002-04:00

That Tim McGraw song hit home for me because that's pretty much what I've been doing for the past year or so. With so many people around me sick and workin' in a hospital and seein' so much... I decided a little bit back I shouldn't take my health for such granted. I am not 30 anymore and I am not the immortal being that you think you are in those years. That's one thing dad always said "If ya haven't got your health you ain't got nothin". So in his honor, I've been trying to find healthy ways to channel stress and I do believe I'm finding it. He'd be proud.

And I must be doing something right if I feel this good and I know my dad always pushed his body to do hard work no matter what - and I'm trying to keep that in mind. It's not easy, but I know it's good for me. Pilates is my new habit. I actually look forward to doing a workout. How crazy am I?? Maybe it's a phase, but maybe not and I'll cross my fingers for the not *grin*.

All I know is I feel goooood. And I am blessed for this day.

And then BANG.

2011-06-02T16:40:00.004-04:00

Out of the clear blue, the work crap starts again.. huge blowout with boss who was wrong, and in my opinion, inappropriate. Don't try to enforce a policy unless you know what the policy actually says. Just sayin'. Employee health nurse sent me home. BP was 196/98 - and that's when I'm already ON BP meds and had just taken 2 mg. Xanax an hour before! Help me Jesus.

So the nerves that I've been trying SO hard to control are hurtin' me today. Literally. Did you ever realize that severe anxiety can actually make your whole body hurt? Well it can. Just so's you know.

But may I give myself a pat on the back - I did a Pilates workout anyway. Tryin' to tame the stress MONSTER. Because Naner-naner. What doesn't kill me will only make me stronger.

Now I'm feelin' more like TWO steps forward and only one little one back.

But it's ok because I am blessed.

Well, you couldn't ask for much better.

2011-05-30T13:23:00.004-04:00

It's been pretty much a perfect Memorial Day weekend - even that wicked thunderstorm last night. I LOVE it when it when the thunder cracks and the flashes are bright in the night... and the smell of the storm... it's all good.

I've been pretty lazy, but busy at the same time. I'm workin' on straightening out my camera stuff and which is the best online sites for putting photos on the Blogger - recommendations accepted. I've got waay too many pictures and no real way to figure out how to organize them. Plus I want to blog more of them and I know pictures are MUCH much more interesting than my blathering on. (hush, you don't have to agree *grin*). I did just order myself a big collage print of a few I've taken - I'll show ya when it arrives ;)

I've got shoppin' done, laundry goin', radio blastin, diet rootbeer, and the AC on high.

Life is good and I am blessed. Amen.

Good morning, Good morning, Good morning.

2011-05-26T06:10:00.004-04:00

And I must say, it is. I was just standing outside for my regular conversation with God. It's the perfect spring day, cool breeze, sun rising bright, everything looking all lush and green from all the rain.'

And mercy of mercy - my boss has now decided OUR office should start observing the holidays too! Usually she makes us work but apparently her budget has shrunk cuz we ALL get Monday off this time. Yaaaa-hoooo!

And guess what! I might go camping SOON! I don't have a tow vehicle YET - but I've been offered a tow to the campground so I can hang out and give my new little camper a try! That makes me very excited. I've been working on getting started on the Pilates again so I have good and strong muscles, cuz sometimes a girl just has to get stuff done herself. Ya know? And I AM a self proclaimed weakling, but I can already feel the Pilates difference. And i've found most people are good and are willing to help if I just ask (which I hate to have to do) but I will be forever grateful. They know who they are.

Even tonight's dinner is all set. A leftover Chalupa and some strawberry rhubarb cobbler. Yes I AM predicting severe munchies - why do you ask?

Anyway, we shall all get through this day. Wherever you are and whatever you're doing or going through... take a deep breath or two and look around - find SOMETHING to be thankful for... and enjoy this fresh, new day.

We are ALL blessed. Amen.

I feel the need...

2011-05-25T19:51:00.003-04:00

to just blather on. Work is ok, because honestly, ever since I filed that first Human Rights case (which I still have no answer), they have not bothered me one bit. I go in and plug in my earphones, listen to something on Netflix and punch the numbers. It's ok.. but still.. feels more like prison than a life.

Anyhoo. Who cares. This is my year of health and that Pilate's machine is hurtin' me bad.. but i figure a few more weeks and things will be much different ::laughing::

As far as camping, yes. I am. I'm going with some people in a week or two, trial. I don't have a vehicle yet to tow it, but soon enough. THEN the adventures should begin *grin*. I just pray I be safe. I do have a bad eye and it's hard to drive, but I know I can do this. Just take it slow and easy. And I will.

Ok, that is all. I'd write more but I'm entranced with a blue agate ring I just bought from Q. ::laughing::: There is no hope for me ;D

And I am blessed.

Well then.

2011-05-23T16:06:00.001-04:00

Nothing exciting to report.. except... I finally dare to say Spring has finally sprung.

Lots I don't want to, or can't talk about and I need some strength. LOTS of it. Any extra prayers ya got that you could float my way would be appreciated. Pass the request to your friends ;D

Isn't spring AWESOME??!!!! Amen!

Seven months.

2011-05-20T22:13:00.004-04:00

As of today, that's how long it's been since my dad died. I am constantly humming Amazing Grace. I was really hoping and practicing for years to play that song on my dulcimer for my dad... but no one ever asked me or spoke one word offering me the chance at his funeral... Some day I'll go to the top of the mountain and play it for him... but until then...

I'll sing it to him every day. (And no, that is not me, nor him in the video link) but it was a beautiful rendition.

And I am blessed.

Four letter words.

2011-05-20T06:12:00.004-04:00

First it was a thousand days of SNOW. Now it's a thousand days of RAIN. When will it STOP?

The grass is growing like it's on steroids but it's just too darn wet for anyone to get out there to mow (although the guy DID come and get mine done yesterday, YAY!). And I have flowers waiting to plant. Yes, even though I have seen one MORE groundhog in the backyard, I'm going to try again. Last year the large family 0f four ate every single thing I put in the ground. We shall see who wins the battle this year!!

Other than that, not much. Just working. Decided the only way to survive it all is to just zone out on the Xanax, listen to Netflix movies and do my 9-5 and wait for retirement. I'm looking at it EXACTLY like a 4 year prison sentence. Just make it. One day at a time. But then, oh...! When I'm finally FREE, I'll be retired at 55 with a fat 35 years of service pension. And no debt. To live like that, I can "do" four more years. I haven't heard anything from any of the legal stuff, but like I said, I don't really care any more. I can save a LOT of money in four years, God willing I stay healthy enough to do it. Just sayin'.

Well, I guess that's all the "news" I have for today. I put on some jeans today that were tight last time I wore them and I expected a struggle.. but they're loose! That was a very cool way to start the day, and a good thing because on Fridays a friend at work always stops at Mickey D's on her way in and picks me up a breakfast sandwich. It's a tradition ::laughing::

Enjoy your weekend peeps. And if you get taken in the "rapture" tomorrow, give the Man upstairs a hello from me, cuz I am surely blessed.

Hello little bloggie :)

2011-05-15T16:54:00.002-04:00

I know, I know... but I've been a busy girl... but I'm gettin' er done. Including just having the carport roof raised two feet so I can get the cutest little camper in the world under it. Yeah.. I really should have thought about the height of that camper before I bought it online and sight unseen, because I had every intention to park underneath The carport I already have. I know myself, If I can't get the camper in and out easy and quick, I know I'll never use it - sooooo, raise the roof I did!! *grin*.

Next up is vehicle shopping for something I can tow it with. I've spent the night out there a few times now and I must say, it IS quite comfy! When I'm ready, I have friends that are gonna take me with them camping and show me all the gee-gaws and how they work, camp etiquette... and how to build a good campfire ::laughing:: I'm looking forward to it. And you know I'm gonna blog all about it. Actually, that's been my "writing project" I'm working on - to document my "camping solo" adventures. I should have plenty to work with ::laughing::

It's been quiet on the job so far and I've heard nothing from the retirement board. But it's ok. I really like having my paycheck and I only have 4 more years to go, I pretty much don't even care anymore what happens, I'm gonna be fine as long as I learn how to take care of me along with everything else. And I'm getting there, one step at a time. Sometimes it feels like one step forward and two back, but I know that's not true and I just put my faith into a power bigger than me. So far, so good.

I've also been doing lots of reading - amazing how handy that iPad has become when it just tucks in my purse! I'm also starting to play with my cameras and even working on writing and camping stuff. Projects to keep me busy... and even as I write this I think what a fine thing it is. There was a time not so long ago when I had no desire to work on ANY hobbies whatsoever, not even reading books... yet look at what I just wrote. What a difference a few years can finally make. I am definitely a survivor.

And I am also abundantly blessed. Amen.

Allergies, anyone?

2011-05-07T12:29:00.002-04:00

I've been practicing.

2011-05-06T19:04:00.003-04:00

Thinking what camping on my own will be like. I've been trying to drive "extra" careful for practice ::laughing;: because I'll be the first to admit it - I'm not a great driver ;D.

I may go SUV shopping this weekend, or maybe next, but I wanna get out there. And trust me, just from events of the past few days, stuff just FINDS me. Stuff just HAPPENS to me. I don't know how or why, but I can already see just from practicing "independence", I'm gonna have stories to tell. Even if it's just little weekend camping getaways for a while, it's all good.

I heard a guy today, over and over, he just laughed and kept saying "ha-Ha!" and was just high on life, (with what he said was a lot of caffeine and good happy meds) and he just kept saying "Life is Good". Regardless of the source of the information, it is. Every day. Let's enjoy each one.

I am blessed.

Feelin' Groovy.

2011-05-03T17:19:00.002-04:00

I am. I have absolutely no news regarding work, but like I said, I get paid very well.. four more years of saving up for retirement can't hurt. Amen. But I'm happy. I finally feel settled for some reason.

And today I had a new hot water tank installed and a SECURITY system! Why I never did this before, I'll never know, but glad I did. Now, even if I'm at work a fire starts the fire dept is notified immediately. Or if glass breaks in a storm or whatever... they got my back. HUGE relief. Living in the country, people aren't likely to hear an indoor fire alarm... so it's all good. It's even got a medical emergency button... just push it and they send an ambulance. VERY cool.

Ok, that's all for now. Think it's time to try out that new hot water heater with the hottest and bubbliest bath I can conjure up.

And I am blessed.

All praise Friday.

2011-04-29T18:49:00.003-04:00

Did I mention I lost my credit card this week? Well I did. Pain in the ass. A million projects going on right now. And two million emotions.

I'm tired as all get out, but it's gotta be full steam ahead for this weekend and next week. I feel the need to be settled. And I will sooner or later, and it will be wonderful.

I know I'm incredibly blessed.. but Lord.. can't a girl have a little bit of fun on the way?? You know what they say, all work, waayyy too much Xanax, and no play... ::laughing::

All tidied up.

2011-04-27T18:38:00.003-04:00

Yep, things looked pretty good at work today. Amazing what a few (or 10) pallets of ceiling tiles can do. A few offices were closed completely because of water damage; unfortunately, not mine.

Anyway.. I have been a bizy, bizy girl. Gonna get my carport extended in height so I can get my camper underneath it. Typical girl that I am, it never entered my mind it wouldn't fit. And yes, I know about tape measures I just never thought of it! Also the front window still to get done hopefully this weekend, a few other maintenance things and security system installed next week. Cool. Now I can go camping and know someone's watchin' my place and I like that feeling. A lot. AND the security system comes with one of those key things to activate and turn off. Oh yes, that is for me ;D

Let's see... not gonna talk about the whole West Virginia saga at the moment. Patience.

I'm getting everything sorted out and lookin' forward to takin' that Gecko camper out on it's maiden voyage and think I'll start lookin' at SUVs this weekend. I really don't want a car payment, but what can ya do.

And so that's pretty much where I'm at. Just gettin' thru the day is fine by me. And I don't know where the whole retirement and Human Rights stuff is at, but If I don't end up getting this early retirement - i only have 4 and a half more years to go. I'll call it Time for: "saving up the Benjamins".

And I am blessed.

Fatima turned six!

2011-04-18T18:41:00.010-04:00

Even though it was four months ago - takes a long time for mail to get to Guatemala and I just got this picture the other day. Fatima is my Compassion International daughter that I sponsor, and I love this program. You can actually correspond with your own, specially chosen child. I have some lovely flower drawings and translated letters from her. And in this picture, she wanted to show me what she spent the birthday money on that I sent her... including her new yellow dress and shoes. Just look at that happy smile! And the Cornflakes and other household goods, I'm SURE, are a big treat that she will share with her family. She's a very generous hearted little girl and in her letters she always asks me to pray for her family (six kids), and I do.

Just thought I'd share 'cuz it makes me happy to see how very much such a little bit can do.

Pay it forward. And I am blessed. Happy Easter in advance ;D we are ALL blessed. Amen.

Happy Palm Sunday

2011-04-17T12:05:00.007-04:00

And I'm sure it is, but my hands are still shaking from the start to MY day.

It was simple enough, I was cleaning the house and moving stuff around. I vacuumed and was moving my Pilates machine. Somehow in the moving of it and how I was holding the metal bars, my pinkie finger got caught. It was wedged right at the little joint closest to the end.

I had the sudden knowledge that if I panicked and moved any little way at all in a hurry the end of my little finger would be sheared off and I had no doubt. I was still trying to hold the machine in my right hand with my little finger of the other hand caught hard.. but it was heavy and I was trying not to stay calm. I finally had the idea to use my knee as very careful leverage until I could put the weight of the metal on the floor. Gently, I pried that delicate little finger out of the place it was jammed. Praise God. It only has an indented cut with a little bit of blood and doesn't look like much... it throbs and nothing is broken, but that was a close one.

Can you imagine how all "gangsta" I would have looked with half a pinkie finger!

I am blessed.

Evening update: finger is MUCH better than I thought it was gonna be - hardly even hurts to bend it. I'm thinkin' of an early evening tucked in with Netflix on an iPad is next and I might even go wild and make some popcorn ;D Carry on.

The sun saying goodnight

2011-04-13T06:25:00.002-04:00

This was the view across the road last night. Only a cell phone pic because camera battery is dead, but I had to share. This was the the finale to my evening of watching deer roam the field and geese landing on the pond. Pretty good, I'd say.

I am blessed, but sure can't wait to get that new front window in.

Okey dokey then!

2011-04-12T20:48:00.003-04:00

Got a deal worked out with a guy about mowing some lawn. ::laughing:: A great deal and he'll weedeat too. (don't go getting all perverted, i know some of you people). Anyway... it works for me as I hope to be a campin' mama come the summer. Still waitin' for the new front window to come in, then gonna get the security hookup.

In the meantime, bein' sorely tempted to buy an SUV asap ;D

I am so freakin' PROUD of me! Some of you have known me for a LONG time.. and can you imagine ME planning cross country road trips by MYSELF?? I can't hardly believe it either.

But I get on my knees and Praise and be Thankful. Amen.

Update 10 minutes after I posted this - Checked my cell voicemail for the first time in who knows when and the window is IN! Yaaaa-HOOO! Construction man says maybe this weekend! Can you tell I'm excited?? ;D

Decisions.

2011-04-10T20:57:00.002-04:00

Trying to decide if I should go ahead and get rid of the "land line" phone. Have had the same number for at least 25 years or so, but no one ever really calls anymore. Mostly kept it for my dad because he could remember it and he could hear better on it. But I have a cell phone and for the price of a landline, I can have a security system. A no brainer I'd say.

But it's hard. A piece of the past. Letting go. Again and still.

Then again - moving forward.

And I am blessed.

A sneak peek..

2011-04-10T12:42:00.003-04:00

I know you wanted to see. *grin* I decided to put the middle table down on the bottom and pull out the "couches" to make a double bed. I'll use that top bunk for storage, although it folds up if I need more head space. I tried it out and it's not bad once ya get up there, but getting down is another story. Just ask my back.

Anyhoo. By the time I trade in my car for a vehicle big enough to tow it - I'll have it fixed up as comfy as a girl could want.

And I AM blessed.

I am So sorry to intrude...

2011-04-09T13:05:00.002-04:00

But I am as close to deliriously happy as I'm ever gonna be ;) In the full light of day and after mucho inspection, that little camper was absolutely, with no doubt, intended for me. I'm fixin' it up right now and I'll post pics after a while, but oh my gosh, the cabinets are white like home and the floor is wood look which is like home. I could not ask for another thing, even inside and outside speakers!!! Tons of storage and tons of lights and the fridge/freezer is bigger than I thought! Me likey very much. Very, very much.

I am blessed much beyond what I deserve. And I am thankful. Every day. Amen.

It is done.

2011-04-06T06:12:00.002-04:00

The paper for the Retirement Board is finished and going in the mail today. Godspeed.

In the meantime I've been busy with RV research. And there's a lot! But here's the thing - this camper means a lot. Say IF I can retire in a couple months - what then? dad is gone and he is what I lived for. To make him proud. I needed something new, a goal, something to look forward to. So even on the worst case scenario, even if I can't retire for 4 years, I can still do a lot of reading and planning. And figuring out how to trick out the inside in a miniature way *grin* And I'm sure I'll fit in a long weekend or three. Besides, it's ONLY 4 years at the Most. Maybe only 4 weeks *grin*

I've heard there's a big difference between being lonely and being in solitude. I believe that's true. Camping by myself will bring peace, I hope. Help calm my soul and so many opportunities to find beautiful places to talk to God.

I don't know, but I knew that I needed a distraction from all the craziness the rest of the world has become.. and what better thing to dream about than camping by a lake, morning sunrise, steam coming off your coffee - and a feather bed on your bunk to climb into at night.

Sounds pretty good to me and there is SO much to learn and so many friendly and helpful RV people out there... I think it'll be good for me.

IF I can ever get the thing home and off the sales lot to begin with ::laughing::

I am blessed.

Thanks Dad.

2011-04-03T19:54:00.002-04:00

I know you'd want me to enjoy this camper. I know the money is comin' from money you saved and sweated for. The bonds you saved no matter how much you needed or if you starved. I believe you will bless my journey to see the world and be proud of me for it, and I think you planned this for me. You told me often enough how proud you were of what I've done and I hope to pay it forward. Guide me and protect my journey.... I pray.

You are my heart and I'm proud as I can be to be the daughter of an honest, God-fearing, mountain man.

I am blessed beyond imagination. Amen.

Overwhelmed.

2011-04-03T18:27:00.003-04:00

All I can say is I am so excited for this camper. Even IF I have to work out the next 4 1/2 years before I can finally retire - half the fun is in the planning. And I sure do have plans ;) Last gift my daddy ever will/would be able to give me and I'm gonna enjoy every darn minute of it!!

I loved camping when we had a pop-out back in the day, but that's too much work for me on my own. Physically I'm just not very strong. Then we had a camp on Lake Ontario - a seasonal but stationary camp and I loved it. I really loved it, but long story short, lost it due to divorce. So now on to the NEW! I have the "Gecko". I mean, what ELSE can I possibly call it? (I WILL take suggestions ::laughing::) But until then, the new camper shall be referred to as the Gecko.

I wrote my letter for the retirement board today. I wrote like a woman possessed and let the words just flow from my fingertips. Tomorrow I have to finish up with the legal references and put it in the mail and call it good. Dentist tomorrow also which is why I'm not gonna pressure myself to finish the paper today. I did most and it is good.

Tomorrow, and after the dentist, I will finish up and mail it out. Cross your fingers for me if ya would and say a prayer if you'd care to do that.

I am blessed.

I own it!

2011-04-02T16:25:00.003-04:00

Oh yes! HELLO baby!! Doesn't it make ya smile just to look at it?

You can see the interior of the exact same model: Here

And may I say woo-hoo! I feel like I'm jumping off the deep end here, but I like it.

I've been thinking about getting a camper for years. I've looked and looked and gotten brave then chickened out again. Finally this little baby has all the amenities and character that I've been looking for. I mean, if I'm camping out in the desert somewhere, I wanna be comfy ;) So I'm takin' a giant leap of faith that I'll be able to learn how to hook up and hitch it and all that fun stuff, but everyone says it's SUPER easy so I'm gonna take their word for it.

Hopefully I'll get to retire very soon and yes, I am working on the paper and plan to finish this weekend, but trying to decide yes or no on the camper was distracting me BIG time. Now I can focus. I hope.

Ohhhh, just THINK of the new opportunities for adventures to blog about that will come along with this camper! ::laughing::

My honor guard

2011-03-31T18:45:00.009-04:00

I could watch this all day long. The day after I had the back windows installed (most excellent), I walked out the front door to go to work and this is what I saw. Only had a minute or two to quietly get camera, but at least I got a quick shot. And in case you can't tell because of the blurry - they're white tail deer. Now you can see why I'm so excited about new windows with unobstructed views so I can watch from inside. *grin* And I'm not gonna Even tell ya about the birds. most anyone that ever comes here watches all kinds come to a feeder in front of this window and they usually comment on how many and all the different kinds. It still amazes me sometimes that people don't see all the colorful birds... bluejays, cardinals, goldfinches, hummingbirds.. all kinds of stuff.. even a rare true bluebird and they hardly ever come to feeders as far as I can tell but I've seen 'em a couple of times now. And may I say, the robins are looking especially gigantic with their red bellies right now, ready to drop that baby blue egg or three, but they are SO fun to watch!

::swoon::

I'm not really all that hard to please ;)

Plus, I took seeing those deer as I walked out the door as a sign that my wild 'ole mountain man dad's talkin' to me, to show me such a sight before a very long day, and I think he approves of the window installation. And I am blessed.

I am happy.

2011-03-29T19:49:00.001-04:00

What else can I say? It's taken a few years, but I finally have me pretty much figured out. And I'm following up on that ;)

Gonna work hard to get that paper done this week, early is always better.

Thinkin' too that I might own a camper before the week is out and that it too awesome to even let myself ponder on for long.

But the NEW WINDOWS!!! OH my! I only have the back done so far - front one is a custom order - but all I can say, what a difference a window makes.

Dad would be proud.

Amen. I am blessed more than I should be. And I am grateful.

Percolatin'

2011-03-26T08:37:00.002-04:00

Yup.. I got that paper brewin' in my head but I wanted to say thanks to my peeps for the kind words and support. Sometimes that's all a girl needs; a gentle nudge.

Actually, I've even got some down on paper, but no need to rush. In the meantime **squeal of delight** I finallly thought of somethin' that might just make me happy and I'm going to have it done.

Go ahead guess. Nevermind, you'll never guess it or you'll just think it's some "jewel" which it isn't *grin*.

I'm gonna have a new front window installed!!! I'm always and forever lookin' out that window because I have a great view of a huge meadow. I look for deer and watch the sunsets. I watch the seagulls and geese landing on the little pond the snow melt has created. I watch the trees change color with the seasons and right now a lot of them have hanging sap buckets on them.

I've been thinking about it for a while and they're coming out next week to give me an estimate and I can't wait! I am absolutely going to love this, and heck, ya never know how long you're gonna live, as dad would have said "a feller might as well be comfortable". And so I shall.

And after that, a home security system with a tv monitor in the house. I've already talked to the company and checked it out. A girl can't be too careful ;)

I swear.

2011-03-25T09:24:00.002-04:00

As God is my witness, a co-worker just came in to my office and handed me a stack of "slightly used" sticky notes with only a little writing on them. She saves them and thought I might want to reuse them. Now that is a tight supply budget... even so... thanks, but no thanks.

Truth.

30 days.

2011-03-24T09:37:00.003-04:00

I have 30 days in which to write a pro se document (meaning on my own without a lawyer), that can change my entire life. If it goes in my favor, and I think it just might, it would be I can retire before summer. But I only have a 30 days from yesterday to submit it - 30 days isn't a lot of time when you have to work every day, slay some pretty damn big dragons and trying to outrun the Devil while you're at it. Just sayin'.

But I know I can do it. I CAN DO THIS paper. I WILL DO THIS paper. And the judge is looking at me favorably.

All I need now is the wisdom and grace to put word to pen, and make it mean something.

Wish me luck.

Make a wish on the moon...

2011-03-19T21:34:00.001-04:00

Get thee back Satan.

2011-03-18T18:14:00.000-04:00

That is all.

And I am blessed. Amen.

And yet...

2011-03-17T19:55:00.004-04:00

As of this very day... people are selling their souls to the Devil.

Amazing but true. Just keeping you informed.

Oh, and PS, I'm looking for a "micro camper". Room for one, but no popouts or anything.. I've got a couple leads, but if you know of anything.. get in touch. This girl is goin' WEST!!

Japan

2011-03-16T13:14:00.004-04:00

Wow. What words can I say? My eyes are glued to the tv, as horrible as it is, I can't look away. At work I listen to live coverage on my earphones. With all the troubles with weather in strange places, so many earthquakes, tsunamis and drought, things don't look good and I think we're getting a BIG wake up call. And I, for one, am paying attention!

Since I live in Central New York, I'm not too worried about a tsunami - but people dont' realize the true havoc a bad earthquake can cause. We've had a couple bad storms through the years that only lasted 3-4 days, but in that short time we found out that if the gas stations are closed. No gas. No electric means no bank machines and no money. Stores are wiped out. It wouldn't take very long, even living here, for things to go very, very bad very quickly. I've been into stocking up for years in case of emergency.. but now I'm getting serious. Essentials only, but I'm layin' in supplies NOW.

This thing with the nuclear leakage scares me to death. Nothing even CLOSE to this big has ever happened in the world before and no one really knows, according to the news I've watched, WHAT might happen.

Sure does make you realize what's important when you sit there on your comfy couch next to the warmth of a heater and a purring kitty on your lap, and watch on your 52" tv screen as humans are swept away to their death in a giant wave they never saw coming.

And the pictures of the grief stricken people. I know that particular feeling of grief, not knowing who or what you are, of what your future will hold, of being all alone. A hurt so big it feels like it can physically be breaking your heart and soul at the very same time. I know that pain and I can feel it for them. But what IS their hope? My mind can hardly think of anything else, yet I know of not one thing I can to do help other than pray, and that I am.

It's also a big day in my own personal life drama as well. A big, big day. Things are moving forward. Slowly. Frustrating. Inch by inch in all arenas, but moving forward nonetheless. Soon, with God's help, all will be revealed and my father's honor restored, and you just never know what papers might come in the mail from my work situation.

And I am blessed beyond measure. Amen.

Oh have mercy...

2011-03-11T22:02:00.005-05:00

The Human Resource guy at work is driving me crazy. He keeps calling me to ask me what happened at the hearing last week. I told him. And then I told him, off the record, how could he lie like he was? I've known this guy for a LONG time... he knows they're wrong. I pushed him and he had no answer. He couldn't because he knows the game they're playing. I'm just gonna keep on prayin' that the truth will eventually be told.

And I am blessed.

PS, I just decided.. I was looking back and seeing all the posts and of course my stat counter knows how many people come here. Long story short, if no one has any comments, I'm just gonna quit the blog and keep on with my Twitter *grin*. Yeah, this might be it. I'm tired of freakin' lurkers.

And besides... I am no longer "Wednesday's Child". I am so much more.

And today's Believe It, or Not.

2011-03-08T22:23:00.002-05:00

Story short, I went to the women's restroom this morning, in the lobby of the hospital where I work. I saw the wide handicapped stall standing open and some how my mind thought it was seeing a half naked woman squatting over the bowl tryin' to do "sum bizness" while tryin' to hold the door open at the same time so she could see her toddler in the stroller which she was using as a door stop at the time.

I asked if she'd like me to watch the baby, an adorable 5 month old girl named Abigail, and she was happy that I asked. And I actually had a LOT of fun makin' that baby laugh. But she may have taken advantage. I played with that baby a good ten minutes, then mom came out and put baby up on the changing table. She really was a beautiful little baby girl ;).

Next thing ya know in comes another mom with carriage, and once again I offered my services, ::laughing:: however that mom was just waiting in line for the changing table.

Ya just never know.

I have a dilemma (sp?) ::laughing::

2011-03-08T21:24:00.003-05:00

For real though. I'm beyond annoyed. My boss has to comment on every. single. thing. I. eat. She passes my desk a thousand times a day and she sees all.

Now listen, the last boss I had was out for 8 months for food issues (starving herself), if this one also wants to eat Cheerios for her entire days meal, that's her choice. But woman - I'm about to say "back off".

Not only does she notice the food I have, usually cheese grits or pork rinds (sorry, the truth is ugly, but moderation *grin*), but she always stops to wrinkle her nose and make a total point of telling me how disgusting it is, whatever "it" might be.

Puhhleeese. WTF. Can a girl not eat some lousy grits in peace? No. You should have SEEN the fuss she made over the cinnamon roll I bought the other day! Not only did she notice and comment when I bought it and she saw it sitting on my desk, she also noticed and commented the moment it was gone. ::sigh::

Yes, this is my life and I surely know I'm blessed. But Lord, some days a girl just gets tired. Know what I mean?

Weird dreams.

2011-03-07T05:06:00.001-05:00

Don't ya hate them? I just had one of those really long dreams that seem to keep going even if you sort of wake up a little. I don't remember much except that it involved cell phones. A lot of cell phones. For some reason I had to make an extremely important phone call in my dream and I was life and death desperate to find my phone. There were a lot of people in the dream and a table FULL of all different makes and models of cell phones. I kept scrabbling at each one, trying to make it turn on, trying with all my might to make it work! To find my phone! None worked, where was it??!! Grabbing, grabbing, scrabbling and scared.....

And then I woke up.

So there we are. And as a public service to ya'll, I'm going to recommend one of my favorite iPhone/iPad apps - Custom Hypnosis. I use it all the time and it's totally customizable to how much time you want to spend and what you want to do. Long and short sessions and your choice of background music. Not only does it have programs to reduce stress and anxiety, it also has quit smoking, exercise more, eat healthy and several more. Truly worth every cent of it's $2.99 price. I've spent five times as much and gotten anything nearly as useful or nice.

There - my duty for the day is done and I just listened to the "be happy" module before I got out of bed and after that dream! ::shudder:: Anyway. Mr. Newsguy says we're in the middle of a brutal winter storm with an advisory out and an average of 7 inches of snow over night. Oh happy, happy, joy- joy.

Me and Gunner (what I call my car, because the only way for me to ever get out of the drive way is to give it gas and "gunner") will forge forward today.

And I am blessed, blessed, blessed!!

See! The self hypnosis works!

Just puttin' it out there

2011-03-05T12:39:00.004-05:00

I'm in a strange state today, friends. That hearing yesterday was absolutely brutal. At the suggestion of my WORK, I put in for disability retirement two years ago... and I thought this hearing was the end of it one way or the other. Not so much.

I had to sit there, in front of a judge, state lawyer and court reporter, and listen in on a conference call to a psychiatrist I've never met. And what HE did is read off an entire history of everything that has happened to me medically since the surgery... I swear that he even read things that I had only confided to therapists, and many things I had somehow finally managed to forget. Yeah, thanks for that. And I had to sit there and say nothing as he talked about how close I had come to dying, ventilators, the coma, that the doctor said funeral arrangements should be started... from there to how it took a year to recover and absolutely everything in between. And he talked over and over about having to work in the same place and seeing all the medical stuff, white coats etc... would naturally only make the PTSD worse. Uh duh. Seems like I've been trying to tell people that.

And all I could do is sit and listen. It IS all the truth, but so hard to hear again in such detail from someone I don't even know! And he sure as HELL stirred up many, many more memories than I'd care to have right now. And he even DARED to question why I didn't sue the hospital!!!!!

And there I had not only a letter from MY doctor saying that work has failed to accommodate and medically I can not take more medications than I am now and I should get this retirement, I ALSO had a letter from the HR guy at work who was kind enough - and just for my asking (snide joke there) was happy to write a letter of recommendation only a few days ago. Imagine that!

But they would not look at nor allow them because, unbeknowst to me... this was a hearing so the state lawyer could cross examine these docs. WTF??

Anyway... you can see where my head is at should future posts occur. Be warned.

PS. I should say though, and how could I forget this part? But it seems like I'm gonna get the disability retirement. The state cross examination and all that went on was hard to hear, but helpful for me and the Judge came right out and said so. The judge was definitely on my side and told me what papers to send in next... and told me he HAS awarded the cause to people based on those papers - can't for the life of me remember what they are. But anyway.... it's gonna be some real hard work for a minute - but it'll all be ok. Amen.

Lookin' good

2011-03-04T18:54:00.003-05:00

Major suckage at one hearing today.. but the judge "felt me" and gave me tips on how to win this thing. Ain't gonna be easy and not much time (30 days) but he pretty much told me - give me what I need and I'll help ya out".

Lord have the mercy to put the grace of words in my mouth and pen. Amen.

And I am blessed.

Happy Belated Birthday

2011-03-02T06:06:00.003-05:00

To my dad... you'd have been 74 today. I'd go ahead and say Rest in Peace, but I won't - 'cuz I know there's no way you're good hearted soul can possibly rest once you seen what was done to you by your own family, and I can't say as I blame you. It was evil. It was low down and dirty. It was purely and absolutely shameful. But we both know all things work for good and we both know what YOU wanted and it's gonna work out and eventually we will Both be able to rest.

I've been told a few times in the past few months that I am the spittin' image of you except for bein' a girl *grin*. They say I act like you, talk like you, and I have the same sort of ways and thinkin' as you. And I can think of absolutely no higher honor...

So I guess as long as I'm alive, part of you will always be. And dad, as God is my witness, YOUR honor WILL be given back to you some day, some how, and I will not rest until it's done if I have to live till 101 to do it.

Amen.

Cosmic Shift, Karma, or a knock on the head from God?

2011-02-27T10:12:00.005-05:00

I dunno.. but somethin' that's been rollin' around in my head and what I really wanna do - I just decided I will.

With all the fuss goin' on after dad died, and me bein' alone and having no one and nothing to account to- my long ago retirement plans have quite changed. And I'm excited.

As soon as I can retire - could be as soon as next week or as late as four years - but I'm gonna travel. And I don't mean frilly, lazy ass cruises either. I want to SEE things, TOUCH things, SMELL things and talk to the people and see what's goin' ON out there before I'm too old to do it.

Specifically, a one woman (and two cat) road trip cross country to see all the things God has put out there that I've always wanted to see. My main goal will be Yellowstone Park, but I've been lookin' with a lot of interest at those shows on TV that do specials where ya can mine for gems and such. I think that would be cool. And I always wanted to see the Grand Canyon too - other than from a plane. Mix that in with some research from Diners Driveins & dives and a solid membership in Triple A - what more could you ask for?

Am I crazy? I think not. Can I do it? With Garmin' and a little luck, I think so. Do I want to. Yes, now that dad isn't there to go "home" to anymore, I want this more than anything. Need to get in some kind of shape and it'd take a while to work it all out, but it sure would be a diversion while I "wait". And if I don't do it soon, when will I ever be stronger and more able?

There's a camper show comin' up soon and you can be sure I'm gonna be there. I CAN do this.

And I am blessed.

Inspired.

2011-02-26T09:40:00.003-05:00

The new kite catalog came in the mail and I was browsing and remembering. Just before my "bad surgery" in 2003, I was on a one woman crusade to have a kite flyin' family which is why I get the catalog. We had just gotten all sorts of line and new kites for each one of us... but I never got to fly mine. When I was recovering, the ex took pictures of "my" kite, a colorful parrot, that they had flown and taken a picture of just 'cuz they knew it would make my heart happy to see it in the sky... and it did.

Well, anyway.. I think I'm gonna try again. I still have some very awesome kites that are brand new and some have never been flown. I have all the gear so why not? Wind is free and it's just cool to watch a kite in the air.

And besides, next time I go down to West Virginia, my dads grave is on top of a mountain so high you think you can touch the sky - and I'm gonna fly a kite up there - just for him. Amen.

Hello

2011-02-25T19:52:00.003-05:00

It snowed. Again. A lot. So I'm trying to pretend that snow isn't out there. Curtains are closed and space heater is purring right along with the two kitties. One so large and one so small and both more trouble than you can believe and they keep me busy.

I've also been reading a lot this past few months which is probably why I haven't been blogging so much. E-readers have been gettin' a workout around here. Since so many books are free I've downloaded some classics that I should have read but just never did. Just a few minutes ago finished reading The Secret Garden and it was awesome! VERY inspiring and a recommended read. Who knew?! ::laughing:: Maybe there's a reason those books are classics ;) and I love having a virtual library at my fingertips anywhere, any time. Cool!

And I am blessed.

I'm just a magnet.

2011-02-23T20:10:00.006-05:00

For the crazies. I generally talk to just about anyone.. but what a day. Long story short, car died - had errands in the city - and yes, I work in the city but I had to go "downtown" to connect some buses so I could get back to my car... and oh my.

I was informed by one gent that this is the US of A and also did I know about Area 71? I said no, did he mean area 41 and he said "NO, SEVENTY-ONE DAMMIT", then kept hollering at cars driving by to ask if they had a lighter to light the cigarette stub he had just picked out of the gutter. Okey dokey then... Then on the next bus I caught I had to sit with a young guy who had more piercings than should be allowed by law and bright hot pink hair..... and the lady in the seat in front of my on the bus with her wheelie suitcase who was telling the whole bus how her daughter was taken away "just because" she was homeless (and with what I'm sure was a fairly low IQ). Yeah, so I'm not really plannin' on going "downtown" in the near future. But it was Interesting! *grin*

But now car is fixed. I told the guy I just needed a battery, but of course, being a man (to be fair, we had chatted a bit, and he honestly was tryin' to truly help me out on the cheap, but still...) he had to run a whole series of tests before he could conclude that I was correct and replaced the battery. Total time spent waiting - 3 hours. And since it's connected to a super grocery store, I have enough food to last to the Apocalypse which is probably gonna be any day now. ::sigh::

Anyway.. just thought I'd check in. It's busy around these parts this past month and doesn't seem like there's time in the day for anything... and the waiting for all these different hearings and such, enough to drive a girl crazy if she isn't already ;)

And just think, only a few years ago, car trouble and all that would have totally freaked me out and now I just take in stride, do what I gotta do and move on. And I'm proud of me ;)

So no major news - other than I was too ashamed to face the Wii Fit lady the other day so I bought the Wii Zumba CD.... wow - just the tutorials was enough to do me in. ::laughing:: I had to sit on the couch and rest and watch the REAL workout ::laughing::

So there we are, all the news that's fit to print at this point in time. But stay tuned friends.. it's about to get VERY interesting.

Well, It's been a while.

2011-02-18T20:36:00.003-05:00

And I am truly and completely wasted. And totally ok with that. Why not? I could get hit by a bus tomorrow. Ya never know. ALWAYS wear clean underwear.

But I had a wondrous day today and I haven't felt THIS happy in quite some time. In case you were wondering.

First week of March, all prayers of strength and prosperity appreciated.

I have learned that perseverance and heart and soul can move mountains. And apparently, it is.

PLUS I have a hoard of half price valentine candy thanks to a certain friend - if she chooses to name herself ::laughing::

And I am WAAAAYYYYYY blessed!

Yeah, sorry..

2011-02-12T09:24:00.004-05:00

I've been a bit enchanted (obsessed) with the iPad and forgot I had a blog. Yes, I can blog from it but there just so MUCH other cool stuff and apps to download. I swear, that thing was invented for people like me who can't keep track of anything. And now there it is, absolutely everything I'd ever need be it in an emergency or just to entertain myself - directions, phone numbers, maps, timers, word processing, games, books, the internet world... all in one slick little tablet... and only one cord to charge. (And yes, I AM a 50 year old little kid, thank you very much *grin*) And I'll go ahead and admit the bigger page IS so much nicer to see.

We've come a long way from DOS commands and an internet that had no pictures. Just sayin'.

It might not make sense to anyone else... but for me... it makes me feel safe. Not so isolated and going places by yourself like the park or whatever, can get a little boring, unless you bring along a little web surfing friend. *grin* Seriously though, being alone is a scary thing and good to have so many resources at my fingertips. Plus it's just a heck of a lot of fun and worth every penny. And also I might mention that it's very necessary to keep in touch with my very cool "internet family" that I've met through the various media and this blog. They already know they're cool - hahahahahaha. But still - there are times in my life when I don't know what I would have done without them... so there ya go.

Mr. Tax Man (I like to call him Mr. Magic) comes tomorrow. I should hear good things from him ::crossing fingers::

And I am Blessed!

My opinion of the iPad.

2011-02-09T22:06:00.004-05:00

SWEEEET as hell!!! If ya know what I mean. It does pretty much the same as my iphone, but then again not. Slick... just slick. For the calendar alone it's worth it 'cuz I sure can't see that little one on my iphone and the keyboard is much better too. Also another thing is I can't STAND to use the little trackball on netbooks and such, so this touch screen is a definite plus on that... and the graphics... have mercy.

Another VERY big plus - it fits the same charge and synch cord as my iphone!!

It took me a little while to get all synched up to my home wireless and synch with my phone because i am a total tech-tard and that stuff skeeves me out and makes me more nervous than it should, but I did it and it really wasn't very hard at all. I still need to find a good word processing program (my only complaint) but I LOVE this thing! Love. Did I mention LOVE it?? Ok. Just so long as we understand that.

I have much writing to do and as a wise woman once told me - "just write". And I spend SO freakin' much time waiting around for the bus and the commute and such - I'm excited to have a way to spend the time.

PS - Best deal - I ordered a "refurb" from apple.com great price and no shipping charge ;)

Twice in a week??

2011-02-09T19:35:00.002-05:00

Honestly. The car wasn't stuck and the driveway was clear. It was gonna be a good morning... till the car wouldn't start. Dead battery. Long story short, Triple A was here and in minutes had it charged and were gone. I heart them guys *grin*

AAA

2011-02-08T18:16:00.002-05:00

All I can say is having Triple A is worth every cent... and I got my money's worth today. Was MAJOR stuck half on the road and half in the driveway. Only thing I could think to do was call Triple A and see if it was covered by my policy - and it was! About an hour later they showed up - winched it and pulled it out. No papers to sign, no big deal 5 minutes and I was on the road. How cool is that? Very. Except the part where I had to drive all the way to work and pay $14 for one day of parking.... But anyway.

The drive has now been professionally plowed and shall remain so. This body just can not shovel that kind of snow anymore. Just not enough strength. So, there we go. And the service costs less than a new purse *grin*.

I'm in legal limbo land so not much to report there. Not so good at the taking lunch to work thing.. it's just not practical, but I keep trying.

I made some good nachos for superbowl. I swear, you just can NOT beat home raised beef. I used the last of what my dad had given me, but I already have my order in with the guy who's cattle it is and who does the processing... and he makes some awesome sage pork breakfast sausage. So I gotta work on emptyin' out the freezer for a refill but I'm in no hurry. Just lookin' forward to the "good stuff".

And I am blessed.

Pet Peeve.

2011-02-04T21:09:00.002-05:00

Ok.. so I've needed B12 shots for years. Been goin' to a clinic which takes at LEAST an hour and a half out of the day and $30 copay. Sort of neglected it this past while and the lab results showed it. So the doc says he can order it so i can do it at HOME! WHY did no one tell me this YEARS ago? So he sends the script in to my mail order place, and they say they can't fill it as it's not in the insurance plan - yet the next day I receive 3 single vial bottles, and no syringes.

So the doc called in a script.. it took two tries but i picked it up today. WOW! the "cheaper" mail order place wanted $85 for 3 doses and no syringes... Went to the pharmacy today and got a multi use vial (probably last a year) and plenty of syringes. Total cost $12.95.

Now please tell, what is WRONG with this picture? I'm THRILLED. But still.. that just ain't right.

Egypt.

2011-02-02T21:28:00.003-05:00

It's in the news. But also in my heart. I remember my first impression (well, the impression right after the one where the egyptian guy was hittin' on me while I was sittin' in the cab)... and in full light of truth.. I wish I could have.. mmmmmm.

But the next thing I noticed was how many same sex people were walkin' arm and arm and I was a little taken aback. I hadn't realized there was so much homosexual activity in this country.

But I was SO wrong. I was ashamed at my first thoughts. The Egyptian people walk arm in arm as a sign of friendship. Closeness. Love. Parents walk along with their hands on the heads of their children, and the children do not object. People are close, loving, and care for each other.

Generosity is a word I would equate with Egypt. I met many a people who felt it important to bestow me with a small gift. Or share a meal, or a tea, or a special fried treat and would NOT take any money in return. And several people.. summoning all their remembrance of the English they knew, saying to me "I Love You". Amen. My heart is with those people tonight. I made friends during the 10 days I was there.. and that's more than enough time to care.

Sunday night, already?

2011-01-30T18:48:00.002-05:00

Well yes indeedy.. I've been a busy girl. I had myself a pretty great day at the mall yesterday and scored some awesome good deals. I really need to go there more often. Like the shoes I was gonna buy anyway, I get to the counter and find out they were 40% off - SCORE!! And at another store, just for the askin' and talkin' nice - another lady gave me a great discount that I didn't know about. I also pigged out pretty big time in the food court and just sat there for a while and people watched.

Do YOU love the people watching as much as I do?? I could spend hours.. I swear... I have to get out more.

But I didn't stay too long - the place was like a zoo and beyond crowded, although it was totally awesome to have the luxury to take as long as I wanted and I try to notice the small luxuries of life like that these days. But I had to get out of that crowd and I already had all the "sales" my credit card could handle. So I spent the rest of the weekend "nesting" in the house. I've been working on this "nesting" thing for months now, just refreshing stuff, cleaning and sorting and tossing out. A coping mechanism, no doubt ::shrug::, it could be worse. Speaking of worse... I do have another one of those Human Rights hearings with my boss this week. Not much tension when we have to work together all day and then go separate to the hearing in the late afternoon. And not speak of it a word to each other.

Did I mention tense? I thought so. And I'm not even gonna mention those horrible 'see all the way around' mirrors in the fitting rooms... Suddenly, my Pilates machine takes on new meaning *grin*.

My work Evaluation

2011-01-25T05:23:00.004-05:00

It would have made you laugh if you were me. I did and I still am. Seems I am a perfectly satisfactory employee with nary anything even close to a negative word said, let alone a suggestion for improvement or complaint. I take them to court and all of a sudden I've improved!!! I did have to mention to her though, how really SHODDY it was that the department never sent me even a "from all of us" condolence card when my dad died. The boss swore up and down she personally sent me one, and maybe she did, there was never a card on my desk when I got back to work and it never came here.

But It's ok, I know at this point they're just gliding along just like me waitin' to see how every thing shakes out. Early retirement might just be closer than I realize!!

Well, I'm turning into an icicle as I have braved the frozen tundra that is my home to run to the computer to tell ya so you wouldn't be in suspense *grin*. Now I have to jump back under the blanket and get warmed back up. I sure hope something good happens today. Amen.

Ahhh.

2011-01-21T20:48:00.002-05:00

Friday. How I love thee. Hmmm.... I don't have much else to say besides that, so I guess that's good enough. ::grin::

Well, except that through the Twitter universe I've met some pretty cool, interesting and smart people...

I am blessed and thankful beyond measure. Amen.

Well, so here we are at Wednesday

2011-01-19T19:03:00.003-05:00

For this Wednesdays Child. Not so bad... all things considered. The legal stuff is startin' to get more intense and I'm makin' it my job to stay on top of stuff. I know people are baffled, and so am I, but somehow I've changed into a stronger, more independent, resilient and proud woman and I'm gonna just keep on doin' whatever I feel is the right thing to do. And goin' with gut feelings from now on. No analyzing anything ::laughing::

OH yeah, I have sins *coughQVC* but I mostly try to do right. And I DO have every intention of gettin' on that Pilates REAL soon....

Anyway. I just broke three, yes three fingernails bringin' groceries in just now. It's cuz I'm determined to get them ALLL at once no matter how heavy. It's an OCD thing or something ::shrug:: but I did it ::grin:: .

Oh, and PS and by the way???? What is with the Walmart check out people? I can't tell you how many times I've gotten home with the receipt and realized they never charged me for that giant box of alcohol and it happened again tonight!! Well my gosh, they loaded the rest of the stuff around it.. I just assumed. And if you'd go back and pay the $20 odd dollars, you ARE a better woman than me.. cuz I'm just a remorseful sinner who's drinkin' a very cold beverage right now. Amen.

A am SUCH a survivor.

2011-01-16T14:56:00.001-05:00

And I am blessed. No matter how hard it seems sometimes.. amen.