Tuesday, June 28, 2011

I'm amazed at the relief.

It is just so darn profound. Surreal. After years of "serving" in hell in that state job with all the micro managers, politics, game playing and BS... I guess when under extreme stress you just get used to it, even if that means needing to be drugged out on a constant basis to survive.

But merciful God... now that the end of that chapter of life is closing, I know that life can feel and be different. Every day in every way since I got the news of retirement the waves of stress continue to fall away... and it's been many, many years since I've smiled so much and it feels good.

The only way I can compare it is to a Veteran who has been in heavy fighting for years, to quite suddenly and unexpectedly, be on a flight home. Difficult to understand and deal with at first, but as the reality of freedom slowly sinks in, life presents itself full of possibilities, and the feeling of being free and never having to go back is absolutely indescribable.

This past week I just filled the last Xanax prescription I'm ever gonna need. Just a few more days to go. God is good.

And I am blessed.

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